As if you needed more proof that I was a nerd:

I was watching an episode of family guy where they did a brief Star Trek spoof. The first thing I noticed was that Data and Wesley Crusher were sitting in each other’s seats, and Geordi was on the wrong side of the bridge (he should have been near the engineering console).

It turns out even Wesley Crusher thinks I’m a nerd. Sweet!

ESPN is reporting a story about how the Nationals have dismissed their chapel leader, Jon Moeller.

According to an article published Sunday in The Washington Post, Nationals outfielder Ryan Church said he asked Moeller if Jews are “doomed” because they do not believe in Jesus. Church said Moeller nodded, the Post reported.

Speaking as a Jew I’d just like to say: who cares? Moeller is a Christian clergy member. So he thinks he’s picked the right religion and that Jews (and probably other religions too), are worshiping the wrong god, or in the wrong way. So what? Most other religions think pretty much the same thing, even if they do try to hide it in their politically correct moments.

“The Nationals did a good job about bringing hate into the locker room,” said Rabbi Shmuel Herzfeld, who leads the city’s oldest Orthodox synagogue, Ohev Sholom Talmud Torah.

Those would certainly appear to be strong words from Rb. Shmuel Herzfeld. Does thinking your chosen religion is right and that the others are wrong really constitute hate? Is Herzfeld actually foolish enough to think that Moeller hates Jews? Of course not! Say what you will about Herzfeld, he’s not stupid. The next paragraph reveals it all:

Herzfeld said he met with Tavares for about 30 minutes Tuesday after denouncing the reported remarks at a news conference interrupted by security officials outside RFK Stadium.

According to another article Herzfeld was trying to get a meeting with the Nat’s team president for a few days, and only called the press conference after he couldn’t get his meeting. Although not stated explicitly, it seemed to work. He met with the team president (Tavares) after his press conference was “broken up”.

The answer to Herzfeld is simple: Herzfeld has on several occasions referred to himself as an activist, and he’s a graduate of Yeshivat Chovevei Torah, an institution founded by one of the truest Jewish activists we’ve ever seen in Avi Weiss. The one thing that activists always need (and I speak from experience because in a previous life I was an activist myself), is attention. Activists usually always have a message, and their main task is getting someone to listen. The press conference and the invoking of one of societys favorite whipping boys – hate speech and hateful people was just an excuse to get attention. Here’s an earlier quote from the WJW:

Ohev Sholom Talmud Torah Congregation Rabbi Shmuel Herzfeld had issued a press release blasting the team on Monday. He compared the comments to the “type of theology that led to the deaths of thousands upon thousands of Jews” throughout history.

The holocaust imagery might be more moving if he hadn’t already used it when attacking The Passions of the Christ with a demonstration so extreme that even the pseudo-fascist ADL thought he was over the top. (I’ve already made my thoughts on who is to blame for The Passion clear in the past). Herzfeld views everything through the lense of an activist, and as such, whenever something happens that will continue to get him an audience fo rhis message (whatever that may be), he takes advantage of it.

There is a problem though with using religion in this pursuit, which is that you run the risk of corrupting your religion by mixing it with politics. The separation of church and state was initially envisioned to prevent the state from corrupting the church – not the other way around.

There is also the issue of Herzfeld constantly referring to himself as the president of the “oldest orthodox congregation in DC”, verbiage which was picked up by various news outlets quoted above, but that is a subject for another post.

Updates (Sept 23, 11:30AM EST)

• I was corrected by two people in the comments – apparently Rb. Herzfeld graduated from RIETS, which is YU’s rabbinical school, not Yeshivat Chovevei Torah as I reported above. I apologize for my mistake.
• Please be respectful in the comments section. I know that mentioning a well known person (especially someone who deliberately tries to ignite passionate feelings), is asking for trouble, but keep in mind that he is still a rabbi, a human being, and deserving of respect. Also remember that although the readership of this blog rarely tops 2.3, it should still not be considered a private forum.

Once again the Israelis are ahead of us in the creativity department. Ha’aretz reports (as translated by Saar Drimer), that Israeli car theives have found a new way to steal cars:

1. Thief rents car.
2. An identical car, legitimately owned, is found and its
   

You know, this is something we talk ahout rather glibly when trying to play the “I know more obscure Jewish things than you” game, but here’s someone who has actually given the subject serious treatment.

Deserved or not, it is now only a matter of time before Michael Chertoff’s head is delivered on a silver platter. The only questions that remain are when and where. To that end, I’m laying odds.

Michael Chertoff’s head will be delivered to:

This has got to be the world’s strangest article I’ve ever read. Pam Anderson is preciding over the wedding of two dogs and gets interruped by Ali G.? I don’t even know where to start with the jokes.

source

Sacha Baron Cohen was dunked in the sea by Pamela Anderson’s bodyguards – after rugby-tackling the actress at her dogs’ wedding.

The Ali G star was dressed as his other creation, cringe-inducing Kazakhstani TV journalist Borat, when he pulled the stunt.

Cohen, 33, in trunks, leather jacket and Village People-style cap, emerged from the surf on an inflatable turtle.

His rugby tackle sent Pammie, 38, hurtling to the sand on the beach at Malibu, California.

Concerned security men grabbed the comedian and dragged him into the sea.

Pam was presiding over the nuptials of her golden retriever Star to chihuahua Luca.

For all the attention that T.O. is getting for selling his ring, I don’t think anyone has noticed that Craig Walendy is doing the same.

When I lived in St. Louis, I appreciated Jay Nixon, the state Attorney General, for setting up the state’s do not call list, which helped me tremendously. (This was before the federal one, and I was getting close to 10 calls a day at the time). In the wake of hurricane Katrina thousands of websites have popped up claiming to take donations for those affected by the hurricane, and the justice system has been fighting back. A few of the websites in question have been run by renowned racist, anti-semite, St. Louis resident, and douchebag Frank Weltner.

Also named in the Missouri suit, which seeks monetary penalties from the defendants, is the apparent operator of the donation sites, Frank Weltner, a St. Louis resident and radio talk show personality who operates a Web site called JewWatch.com.

…

The various Web sites, which use similar imagery and slight variations on the same crude design, all point back to InternetDonations.org. There, visitors interested in donating to the Red Cross, Salvation Army or other relief organizations are told that “we can collect it for you in an easy one-stop location.”

It is unclear whether any of the sites successfully drew funds from any donors, or if Mr. Weltner, who did not respond to e-mail messages and could not be reached by phone, had channeled any proceeds to the better-known charities named on his site. But the restraining order issued yesterday enjoins Mr. Weltner and Internet Donations Inc. from, among other things, charitable fund-raising in Missouri, and “concealing, suppressing or omitting” the fact that donations collected were intended “for white victims only.”

“It’s the lowest of the low when someone solicits funds” this way, Mr. Nixon said in an interview before announcing the lawsuit. “We don’t want one more penny from well-meaning donors going through this hater.”

Mr. Nixon – thank you for doing your job to help clean up the trash. For at least the next week or so, you’re my hero.

Mr. Weltner – I’m sorry you got dumped 10 years ago by your gay Jewish lover. Please find a better way of dealing with your anger than taking it out on Jews and African-Americans and defrauding innocent Americans. Until then, you suck.

I’ve decided that I need to learn Hebrew. This is not the first time in my life I’ve made this decision, but this time I plan on following through on it in the long term. I am unfortunately at a loss as to how to start learning a foreign language. I know the best way to learn is with complete immersion as a young child. Although I do frequently act like a child, the pathways in my brain are not as young as they used to be. Immersion is also impractical at best. I already know the alphabet and can read just fine, what I need to do is increase my vocabulary and improve my grammer. Have other people learned a language at an older age successfully? Does anyone have any recommendations of resources/classes/website/something that would be useful?

I’ve been trying to get tickets to the Eagles Redskins game on Nov 6 on ebay. Unfortunately I’ve been getting outbid at every turn since I don’t feel like spending $200 for a pair of tickets in the cheap section. Someone emailed me a few days ago saying that he had noticed me bidding on Redskins tickets, and if I was still interested he might have some to sell me. Suspicious but not wanting to miss out on a great opportunity if it was real I decided to email him back and see what he had to offer. After a few emails back and forth he has revealed the following:

• He has 8 tickets evailable in section 101, arguably the best seats in the house
• The tickets are $100 each. (Hard to believe since equivalent tickets go for $500-$1000 otherwise).
• He lives in the UK.
• He insists I pay by Western Union.

Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

I think I liked Rebecca’s response to this last night the best: “Why doesn’t he just tell you he’s a deposed Nigerian warlord willing to share billions with you like everyone else?”

Ah well, back to ebay.

I titled the last post “the cell” because I intended to segue from David’s comments about being too soon to make Katrina jokes to a series being pitched in Hollywood called The Cell, which is a sitcom based on the lives of three would-be suicide bombers. Somewhere along the line I completely fumbled the handoff and ended up talking about Laura Bush and Sean Penn instead. (I would claim that this doesn’t happen often, except for the fact that it does). Anyway, on to The Cell.

Although the New York Times tries to put a soft and fuzzy feeling to the show, let’s be real for a minute about what it is. It’s a sitcom about people who have been responsible for the murder of thousands and thousands of innocent civilians in the past 5 years. I think that the warm and fuzzy thing actually bothers me a lot. What’s next, are we going to see a sitcom about the BTK killer where they show his humorous side? How about a romantic comedy about Hitler or Stalin?

Finally, I leave you with this:

When hurricane Katrina made landfall near New Orleans it began raining havoc on the city and it’s surrounding area. It didn’t bother to rain on the French quater – it had surrendered already weeks ago.